Sunday, August 21, 2011

Faith on Bad Days

There are days when I question my blindness. I ask the usual questions, "Why me?" "Is there a reason for me going blind?"

Of course I have no real answer to any of my questions. I cannot say God has singled me out for a special purpose, there is no exceptional evil in my life. I try to remain positive, do what I can and work on keeping myself held together in times which are frustrating, emotionally trying and very, very lonely.

Today I heard a sermon which in part clicked in my brain. It was on the question of love and our relationship with God.

The Pastor spoke of God's love being supportive. He knows our strengths and weaknesses. He gives us a trial and provides the support for that trial.

It brought to mind the words of Mother Theresa of Calcutta many years ago. She was asked what made her remain faithful. She said that she needed God's love and support everyday of her life, she knew God would never let her down, but then added "But, I wish God sometimes had a little less faith in me."

It is a curious thought, the trials we face are trials of our faith, ability, they test our will and they make us stronger. But in the end God knows not to break us, hHe only tests us to bring about our love and strengthen our faith.

This is a little off my usual writing and if anyone is offended, I apologise, but in the end. I want to share that I accept the fact that my blindness mayy be a trial of me as a person, my faith and my ability to love. I will trust that God in His infinite wisdom will not break me. That I am to use the opportunities He gives me to make me stronger.